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Stop Wondering

by Blood Skid

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1.
Hello my names disappointment Know the story of my choices Love all drugs known to man Pussys wouldn't understand Written on your child's wall Shadow dragged through every hall My thoughts always filled with sin Perfect human gone to shit Such a lazy stupid bitch I can't even start my life Apathy controls my mind There is nothing left inside Knowing I'm misunderstood Makes me fake and lie to you Won't explain the wrong I do See my ways Extract my pain Make my reasons sound the same Only cuz I can't be tamed All you know is selfish dues I won't say what I'd do Pathetic is my fucking name Slowly I am going insane I can't find any hope So i just decide to give up Disappointment I own my shame I will be the one to blame
2.
Thoughts 00:36
Being alone in the silence Pulling Hair being violent I don't really care About being here There's no way out How'd I get in I can't stand it I'm not really here It's my nightmare That I've been in 4 walls closed in I can't focus Doubt and sadness Also my madness Will all cloud around My brain
3.
Jagged 00:21
Split between attraction That turned into a hate I can't stand the sight of you Please just go away Wait don't go Worries brought up today Smoke for me to pretend sane Everything's an arm and leg I'm to broke for weed today Understand my self hate
4.
All these problems I can't solve them Build me up to be destroyed My purpose in life To be a toy Always down never up sad and unhappy Through my struggles everyone's laughing Don't be by my side Bad choices that I hide To be a victim and play with your mind Don't be fooled fake and cruel How it is when I'm with you A big lie one out cry Not enough to hide these lies I'm a parasite A toxic mess Apart of you And when your safe I'll prove you wrong You're not special I told you that And now you know You're just a pawn In a game of found emotions Going through my brain And out of place But you should've known from the start
5.
Hell Yeah 2x 00:26
Everyone's a narcissist The human race is cancerous Made me turn to cannabis to take away my problems See my pain Enough gained What's the purpose of existence Maybe for us to be different Make an album like ballistic to get through the pain Why do you play the victim Just to end up being with him Pay for your decisions How you waste your time Going with the world And how it makes you feel inside How you really want to die Finding out what's up with me To play off your own needs Act as if we're suffering
6.
I'm Done 00:26
While you waste your time on me I can aim right at your knee Destroy your hype with a few words Make sure you don't come around Make sure that you keep that frown What you feel is my words Penetrate with nouns and verbs Because you talked I'm going off Crossed the line Know my grind You'd have to try To have what's mine
7.
No Hope 00:42
There's nothing left I can do All my hope is wearing thin Its bleeding through Empty inside I've dug a deep hole Sinking slowly I can't get out Talked to me as if I'm stupid Boy I'll kill that attitude 4 lines off the dome Kick the rocks You know your through
8.
Another Bowl 01:13
My dependency can make me be a bad person But who isn't these days Going back forward to find out when I get passed it And it won't go away I can't live with the fact that I don't need it Because when I don't have it I feel the pain that it hides Qualities and properties that made me human All left when you arrived But what do you expect me to do? Be alone and conversate with myself Lose focus on what's important Prioritized my drug instead I'm going hungry I have no cash Spent it all on weed that didn't even last I need to change the way I plan Can't go outside until it's cashed Won't handle things on a sober mind Yes i know it's a crime But reality comes back and it gets harder to breathe Pack another bowl to get through the cycle of things
9.
Suffocate 01:15
Proven wrong again If you came back I would turn on myself Just to enjoy your embrace One last time Now what will you say when you ran out of words Caught in a lie so you lie so it's worse Stuck at every corner with no reason to why Explaining to myself that's living life I can't justify the decisions I make I can keep destroying and never create Won't amount to shit and if I did I was framed Don't believe it's all good I crave the pain (Detach from the feelings You've grown to enjoy You're the reason why I suffocate) Be rid of your good vibes and petty beliefs What's important to you means nothing to me Comprehend what I say and then you'll see my deep depressive delusional feed (Cease the feelings Cease the hurt Sick with apprehension Suffocate)
10.
3 am as I stare in the distance Altered perception Comprehending existence Seems I will never leave this place Because I don't change I get worse with age Stuck in a trap that I set for myself High expectations so easily failed Lack of motivation I can't find the time More situations I make with my pride It's all just a lie To make it better High hopes to get me Through the weather Puff puff on my weed So I'm a feather Flowing through the sky But death is better Causing my anger to get much worse Watching all my pleasures Become a curse stuck in a self loathing negative state All things take an effort that I won't create I used others To kill the void that you caused These promises that are false Self care is lost become someone I'm not

credits

released January 3, 2018

Recorded and mixed by: Moses Crist

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Blood Skid San Antonio, Texas

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